Saturday, July 16, 2011

shut up and watch

From Evernote:

shut up and watch

The other night I watched the final installment of The Harry Potter series' Deathly Hallows. And no, I won't give a review or comment about how great or bad the film is or give you any spoiler for those who haven't read the book. This is all about my movie experience.

Okay, so first of all we go to the cinema to watch a movie not to chitchat with our friends or go there to harness our commentator skills. But there are some movie patrons that are really annoying and does not care about people who are there to watch and enjoy the movie too.  I'm all cool with those who give exaggerated reactions (when watching) like a loud laugh, or a high pitch scream, a constant giggle those are all but natural response . What irritates me are those who go to the movie house and watch as if they own the place. 

Meet some of my annoying seat mates:

a. The Commentator - these are the people who can never keep their mouth shut. every scene they have to say something; like how lame the actor's expression is; how Ron's eyes are big; how the twins have grown, that Dumbledore looks like Gandalf, that Ginny is ugly, blah blah blah blah blah... Its alright to express your opinion but to give out your comment on every scene and actor is way too much for me to handle. i didn't go there to hear you speak your thoughts on the film.  

b. The (feeling) Know-it-All - the smarty pants who thinks that they know everything that happens in the story. even if you read the book or wrote the script itself who don't have the right to tell the others what will happen next or how the protagonist will die or whatever inside info you have read on the book. you're killing the climax!

A man seated at the back explains something about Snape. In all movies, before the film ends there's an explanation why certain events happen. duh?! But he kept on blabbering about it. And then my seat mate, another wiseass said (when he saw the 9 3/4 platform at the train station); oh look, yung nine and three PORTERS! kuya pa-impress: EPIC FAIL!

c. The Chatter - at the very least the commentator and the know-it-all talks about the movie, but the chatter doesn't care about the movie. All she/he cares about are the mundane things that happen about him or between him and his companion. how the exam was hard; or how demanding his boss was. hello?! you can do that talk somewhere else. i didn't go the movie house to listen to your life and problems. I have my own, I don't need yours.

d. The Rocker - these people never sit still. they rock or swing their feet back and forth which in turn makes the whole row feel the swaying motion of his feet. When Law, Mimi and I watched X-Men we thought there was an earthquake, turns out the man at the end of the row was rocking his feet so hard. Mimi and I got dizzy. Please people be considerate.

Also falling on this category are those who tap their feet behind your seat. Its irritating. 

e. The Don - speaking of feet, these people doesn't respect those who sits in front of them. They put their feet up on your headrest so you have 2 big rabbit ears behind your head. what's bad is when you turn to face them you'll catch a whiff of smelly feet or worse you might even accidentally kiss their soles.

To deal with those insensitive movie patrons, here's what i do:

a. the move - I shift or change my sitting position and give a loud sigh, enough to make the annoying seat mate realize that they are bothering me. 

b. parinig  - if the 'move' doesn't get enough attention; i resort to parinig. i usually say, 'ang ingay naman!' or 'bawal magkwento ng mangyayari', 'wag kang malikot nahihilo ako'. As i said, there was this 'rocker' who kept on swaying his feet, i'm starting to have a headache, so I blurted out, 'isa pa tatadyakan na kita'. then he stop swaying. for a while. then after 10 minutes, he started swaying again which led me to confront him.

c. the confrontation - when all else failed. this is my last resort. i would call their attention and tell to stop talking or stop swaying their feet. it depends on the level of my annoyance, i do it in a nice way. But sometimes, my mean streak would come out and i don't care if they'll be humiliated in front of other people, i'll say what i want. 

i tapped the "rocker's", shoulder and said, could you please stop that (pointing to his swinging feet). hilo na kame dito eh! (and by the way, we were one seat apart, and Mimi was 2 seats away from him that's how strong he was swaying).

then there's this one time, i lost my cool and a group of girls seated at my back got a taste of my fury. 'pwede pakihinaan ang kwentuhan nyo, hinde lang kayo ang nanonood dito! 

Remember when you watch a movie be mindful of other people watching too.  Don't talk loud, if you can't resist telling the plot, do it discreetly. Please don't put your feet up or rock your feet. Think of your GMRC (Good Morals and Right Conduct) lessons when you were young. Now is the time to make use of that.

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