Tuesday, October 30, 2007

the one that got away

Airport, that's where it all began...

I haven't really noticed him at first. And then one fine day on July, he passed by my counter, he asked a lot of questions about the flight. Who was this tall guy with a smile on his face? Oh, he was one of those friendly flight attendants that greet and chat with ground staff like me ('cause other FA's don't do that).

A week after, I've been receiving anonymous sweet text messages. I can't remember the exact message but there was line that says, "why do we close our eyes when we kiss? its because the sweetest things in life are meant to be felt not seen, so asked me why i cant see you right now?". I couldn't figure out who sent it.

I did a lil' research, and found out the tall good looking guy who turns out to be a sweet gentleman was the one sending me those messages. I told him that I already knew who he was, he said that he will introduce himself properly. We went out for dinner; at that first meeting, we hit off right away. Talked for almost 4 hours non-stop, we could go on till forever but we still need to report for work the following day. So, we agreed to meet again the next night, until he was my constant companion. Right after his duty, he'll head straight to my dormitory and we'll have dinner together. He'd show me his 'flying' schedule, ( I call it, 'life plan') to work out our plans in advance. If there's a delayed flight or he was slated on the last flight, I take a nap first and wait for him to show up at my dorm so we could eat together. We would admire the beautiful night sky, our hobby was to gaze on the stars and talked about our dreams and future.

But we never really discussed our situation, we just enjoyed each others company. 
Friends and officemates wondered, what was going on. They kept on asking whats between us but I kept mum about it because I really don't know what to say.23rd of December, I got my schedule; duty on Christmas Eve. According to his 'life plan', he has a flight on that same day. Since both our family's are away from us, we decided to celebrate Christmas Eve together. 24th of December his flight was cancelled so he can still go home to his family to spend Christmas with them, but he opted to spent it with me. He didn't want me to spend Christmas alone . aww... sweetness! :)

New Years Eve falls on my rest day, unfortunately he has a flight. In return, I didn't go home, and spent New Years Eve with him. We welcomed the new year by partying at Rockwell. It was new year, I was full of hope, life and love. 
That's what I think...

And then, something happened... One day, he sent me a text message. "you were always there when i faked the tears, you were always there when i faked the pain, you were always there when i faked my sadness, but why you didn't catch me i didn't faked the fall?" I didn't know how to respond to this kind of message, I asked him what does it mean. But he said,' just shrugged it off'.

I can't take it anymore, I told him a story about a guy a really liked. It was like giving him a clue about us. I said that I really liked a certain guy but he's giving me mixed signals, sometimes he would treat me like a friend, other times he would treat like a girlfriend. And then he responded, 'do i know him?', 'is he close to me?'. Stupid me, I said it was someone he didn't know because I was too embarrassed to admit that HE WAS THE ONE! We never talked about it anymore.

Then, I noticed some change. The nightly visits became weekly, then it became once a month. We still talk whenever we see each other at the airport but that's about it. 
Later, I learned that he moved to a new apartment, a bit far from my place. And I was assigned to a different airline, this means I'll be 
moving to a different airport, no chance to see him anymore. Every once in a while, he'd still send me text messages, and sometimes we would still meet.

Lesson learned:
NO GUTS, NO GLORY!  If I have just voiced out what I really feel for him, then I would not be dwelling on this 'what if' scenarios.

As for me, I think he is the ONE..... The ONE that GOT AWAY!!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

i have this bookmark that says..
"there is no remedy for love but to love more" (by thoreau).